We are the Borg!

The West asks: Why were there protests and boycotts and burning of Embassies and threats over things so innocuous as cartoons. Surely cartoons are for laughing. Don’t Muslims have a sense of humor?

There is an answer that will satisfy the religious, another that will satisfy those who think in terms of politics, yet another other that involves a clash of civilizations, and then there is the truth. I weighed it very carefully, because as some of my readers may have discovered I do a lot of self-censoring, and by the look of things, the West at least does not want talk that is restrained. It is more comfortable with free speech.

OK then, I will take the plunge and tell you the truth about us Muslims; it will be free from self-censor.

There is a big secret about us that is known only to a few, but perhaps some of the truth has got out, hence this constant hammering of the violent minority although an overwhelming majority of Muslims have condemned the slogans calling for death or holocaust.

Research on Islam has been going on for a very long time - centuries. Some of this has resulted in good, and some of this has exposed such dark secrets about us that these secrets have to be kept under wraps.

The CIA thought it knew all about us, but then something happened, and the CIA had to commission this research. Some time ago in the last century it happened so that the Shah of Iran fell, and Iran became an Islamic Republic, and gave up all the goodies and the civilized behaviour like nudity and nightclubs and wine and gambling (all things that enhance the GDP and make one civilized), that it had learnt from the West, and the women went back to wearing the oppressive veil (or at least the hijab) and the like; and horror of horrors, they even voted in the dreaded backward Shariah (the Shia version).

The Director of CIA was grilled on German TV about not being able to foresee it even while the CIA for Asia was centered in Tehran. He said in his defence something to the effect that "we thought we understood the Muslims, but obviously they (the Muslims) have some trait that is unpredictable."

The CIA then set about to remove this unpredictability by commissioning the research. That research yielded what I am going to tell you:

You see we Muslims are violent.

No big deal here as any sensible non-Muslim has seen by now, because although all the Muslims here have condemned the slogans, they haven't condemned the protest over the questioning of "free speech" about the prophet (Peace Be Upon Him). Hence we Muslims must, by definition, be violent.

However, the CIA research goes further, and tells you why:

We Muslims have a "terrorism" gene, and a "terrorism" meme.

If we are born Muslim, we are violent by virtue of this gene, and if we are converts, then alas the meme thing comes into play, because just saying the shahada puts the meme in there.

There really is no hope for us, but as we multiply faster than rabbits and we are immigrating into other cultures, we will take over the world.

At one time Europe understood us better, and the truth about us is told in the frightening stories of yore. The Inquisition understood us best.

We are the Borg; be warned that the world's inhabitants are being Borged.

That’s the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.