Why probably, will become clear at the end, I hope.
Well, she won't agree with you at all that she has lost anything worthwhile. She will insist that, on the contrary, she has gained a lot.
In fact, she may not even waste any time on you if you suggest something like that to her.
She won't be ignoring you out of snobbery, for she isn't a snob. She is a very sensible, down to Earth person, with her feet firmly on the ground. She has always been like that - from childhood. The reason for ignoring you would be because she does not want to take part in arguments and bickering. She had enough of those when she made the most important decision of her life, as a teenager.
But if she were giving one of her rare interviews, and you were the interviewer, she will give you a reply, very softly, and she would tell you what she thinks is the truth. She won't lie and she won't refuse an answer, for she is a person of principles, and she does not lie.
She may or may not also point out to you something that I definitely must, to be honest to her. That something is her successful career, and how she had risen very fast in that very competitive, catty profession, where at any one time no more than 25 girls occupy the top slots, to reach the very top in only three years.
If she does mention her success, she will do so with a disarming smile and a matching attitude that she isn't special, just lucky. "There were and are thousands of girls who could be doing what I was doing", she will say. She will also tell you that her success is due to those unsung heroes who work in the background to make girls like her successful. She will name their professions, she may even name the persons who helped her become what she did become - a household name and recognized face in Europe and the United States, from the most humble and overworked floor-scrubbing housewives to the elite, including the Royalty.
She would be right of course, for she is sensible and never lies, but it is humility that makes her dismissive of her own talent and hard work that she put in her profession. Without that, she would not have been the unique success that she was. She made it look so easy, so natural, that people forget there is hard work behind it all.
That would show you success in her career. Out of humility she won't mention that her annual income was in the millions, but you can easily search the net to find out what the top earners in her profession were getting.
She will point to her husband, and her daughter, for she is in a happy marriage, and is totally devoted to her adorable daughter and very successful husband, who is equally and visibly in love with his wife.
When she retired from her career for marriage and looking after her daughter, she had tens, if not hundreds of millions of dollars. She had apartments in New York and Florida, and maybe in Paris. The man she married, had an order of magnitude more money than her.
Of course, if you are the interviewer, she is most likely to invite you over to her house. Don't be surprised at her New York home in an exclusive suburb with lush gardens and private swimming pool. Nor should you raise your eyebrows at the three SUV's parked there. Hers is a very sensible living. What she has and why she has invited you to her home, is not to show off her success, as she is a very private person. She is no longer in the news, but that is because of her own choosing. She has successfully and on purpose left public exposure. This does not mean she doesn't do anything which is not in the public's interest, but more of that later. If you do get invited to her house, and I sincerely hope you do, since you are doing the interview, ask her to show you her wardrobe. You will be pleasantly surprised at her selection. It comes from the finest and the most expensive brands, as do other things in her house. And it is all in very good taste, or maybe it is just her. Everything looks just superb when she is around.
The assets I have outlined above is for her day-to-day living. She has villas and apartments in other exclusive places, too, like Israel, for example. Her husband is a shrewd investor and real estate lawyer. Among his exclusive projects, he has invested in development of real estate for the wealthy in Israel, and she has wisely entrusted her financial matters to her husband, like all Jewish sensible women do. They look after the house, and leave the money decisions in their husband's hands. They are secure. And despite the fact that women from her profession often find their marriages do not last, hers is likely to do "till death do them part", and maybe even beyond death. If you are familiar with the prices of luxury apartments in previously run-down slums of Jaffa, that have been bought by the not so insignificant Israelis and Americans, you will marvel at the business acumen of her husband.
If you were to mention the loss of accommodation and livelihood to those who were living in those slums, she may give you a convincing lecture on the benefits of capitalism. She has a degree in Business Administration, and her own life proves that capitalism has made the American Dream come true for her, and for some others. She may list for you some of the many professions that have grown out of her own, thus creating work for many. She may then list for you the many others, that her husband, as a real estate investor and lawyer, has helped grow.
When her husband and his brother are known to be involved in a deal, the other parties get cold feet. If they are wise, they would simply leave the field for them. These brothers have taken on governments like that of the Philippines and the city of New York, potentates like the King of Saudi Arabia and the Emir of Kuwait, magnates like the owner of Harrods, international wheeler-dealers like Adnan Khashoggi, and a host of other super-rich and super-powerful. And they have come out the winners in each case.
Now let me ask you, if that isn't success, what is. The girl we are talking of, has made a wise choice, although she married for love. She always had a wise head. It came to her by associating with people older than her.
She will say she is just lucky. I will of course, dispute that as I dispute the wisdom of her choice, but we will leave that disputation for later. Oh sure, most people in the world, most specialists of worldly affairs, will agree that she has been lucky in that sense of the word. But I prefer to be in the minority. I do not base my analysis on democracy or specialist opinion.
She wasn't always so lucky. Her father struggled to give his family a middle class living, and she always found people who had more, much more, than her. Her father took her to Dislneyland, Florida, when she expressed a desire for this, but then she wanted a yacht, a holiday in the Bermudas, a swimming pool in her home, designer clothes, and much more. She was born to a mixed-culture and mixed-ethnicity couple in a bi-lingual city, and she learnt at least two more languages - the native tongues of her father and mother and she can read another one as well.
Her mother felt the husband was neglecting her and the daughter. He wasn't, but the wife wanted all time in the evening to the family. So her childhood saw fights between her parents, who divorced when she was nine.
She was the odd one in the whole school. She inherited a beautiful body from her mother, and the color of her skin from her father, and that made her stand out. Cross-ethnic children are often very attractive, but the children do not know it. That also made her peers make fun of her, and to shun her. After many unsuccessful attempts at getting into their circle, she learnt to keep her thoughts to herself. She started hanging out with quite children older than her. And she became mature much earlier - mature and worldly wise. She saw what the others were doing, and what they were having, a good time, wine and dancing and exposing the skin, and friends of the opposite sex, and she wanted that. When you are a teen, you want that. I don't blame her. I too wanted the same. I have seen some who didn't, but they are in a very small minority. Most of us want a good life in this world. Don't you?
What is wrong with that?
Nothing, I suppose, for those with a different outlook on life. But again what was wrong may become clear later. Let us continue with her story.
In her mid-teens she became a rebel. Perhaps many teenagers think of rebellion and where they can, they do so. She started dressing and making up like a rebel. She was working as a waitress in her mid-teens when she was spotted by a talent hunter who saw her walk by. He tried to persuade her into a career for which he thought she was eminently suited. This career had been suggested by her mature friends as well, but she had laughed it off. Now the talent scout wouldn't let go of her until she said yes. Her parents were not happy with this. Although divorced, nd from different cultures, they disapproved of such careers as they thought these were unhealthy from the moral point of view.
She had been resisting the demands of the talent scout on her own. Now that her parents were against it, her rebellious nature came to the fore, and she decided to give that career a try.
Arguments and fights followed. She had to stay late or even out of town. Her father couldn't put up with it. His standing in his community had gone down. His leadership was in question. He would lose it soon. She wanted to do whatever she liked, without any religious or moral restraints. The differences came to a head. Neither the father nor the daughter have revealed what happened, but one day she stormed out of her father's house to go to New York, never to go back again.
Some will say this is the best thing that has happened to her, for her career took off from that day, and what a career it is! No one like her has been seen before or likely to be seen since. She was unique in her chosen career. No one has been able to reproduce the strange combination of disdain and invitation in her. From a purely artistic critique, her performance has been brilliant throughout her career.
So she was a success in her performance, and that brought her fame and fortune. She was commanding millions of dollars in annual earnings within two years of that move to New York.
She was sensible. Success did not go to her head. No scandals are associated with her. She did not do drugs. She did not hang out with that crowd. Instead her boyfriends were established and moneyed Jewish lawyers and professional people - all very straight, all who would become the pillars of society. The paparazzi did chase her, but gave up, there was no juice to report.
She was careful with her money. She did not throw it away on whims and toys. She invested it wisely, and her Jewish friends helped her. On of these friends became her steady lover and fathered her daughter. After the daughter was born, and not before that, she married her boyfriend. Generally once a woman is pregnant by a steady boyfriend, they marry before the child is born. Not in this case. I wonder why.
However, it has been a successful marriage. She has devoted herself to her husband, her daughter, and her husband's circle. She also demonstrates her social conscience by raising money for charity and environmental causes. She is no longer seen or heard of in her previous profession, although many long for her to return. Both husband and wife are Democrats. Both have donated $2300 each to the Democratic Elections this year (2008).
She is not a feminist. She has dropped her father's surname, and taken on her husband's, signifying that her rebellion was against her father.
The world will say: All in all a successful life, and she is only 37 at the moment. Plenty more time to go, and achieve more.
Why then did I title the post:
"The girl who lost everything"
Unfortunately, the girl traded in her deen for all this that she has today.
Initially all she asked was to be allowed to model. The parents objected, as this was against haya, and would eventually lead to a morally corrupt life. She insisted, but it seems that she knew what she was getting into. Later, when she had become successful in her career, she said in an interview, almost mocking her father, that when she had made known her decision, her father went to her agent in her city, asking that his daughter should not be given lingerie modeling jobs. She laughs at this, saying: "It is funny, really funny". It sure would look funny to her here in this world; for she was modeling see-through underwear; she was photographed baring nipples of her breasts; she was photographs topless, and even totally naked in one internet shot.
She started drinking, dancing, having boyfriends to enjoy life including sleeping with, and eventually she also made at least one sex video.
It isn't that she did not know better. Her father took her for Hajj, in her early teens, and she toyed with the idea of leading a religious, pious life. Again at an interview she said: "(My father said:) I (i.e the daughter) am a Muslim. Islam does not allow one to drink alcohol, dance, mix with the opposite sex, show skin - all that I am doing now. I am putting him in jeopardy (this is a reference to the criticism he was facing for not being able to bring his daughter in line). It was all very dramatic". This was said in a mocking tone. And this: "I do what I am. This is what I like. This is what I am."
So, what her father said was dramatic to her,; something to joke about; something to make fun of.
What does she imply: that she has given up Islam.
The parents were right. Modeling leads to corruption.
When she dies, if she dies unrepentant, she will find the trade was one of severe loss for her.
Would you also make a deal with Satan, to give you this world, trading in your faith?
Oh, you can be liberal, we will let you have a social conscience, subject to the interests of the Israeli security, of course.
Let us hope and pray she comes back to the deen.
Friday, December 05, 2008
Why probably, will become clear at the end, I hope.